绿叶鸟网（www.lvyeniao.cn）原创整理的 > 大学英语作文 The Essence of Private Enterprise
Chauffeur-driven Rolls Royces, bodyguards, continual reports and attentions, thousands of enthusiastic fans, millions-of-dollar annual income ... pop stars today enjoy a living which was once the privilege to Royalty and the shining lives are aded by many ordinary people. Howr, on the other hand,we can also hear grudges around us that the stars gain too much.Is it fair for the pop stars to be highly paid?
In my opinion, it's right that the stars are highly paid.They've made great contributions to the entertainment, to the sports world and brought tremendous excitement as well as joy to our ordinary world. Besides, pop stars earn vast sums in foreign currency and the tax collector can only be gratel for their massive annual contributions to the exchequer. Accordingly,who in the world would begrudge them their income?
We always hear people in humdrum jobs complain about the highly paid stars and their luxurious lifestyle. They may not know the harsh competitions and the cruel reality they have to face with ryday, not to mention these distinguished stars representing only the tip of the iceberg. For each famous star,there are dreds of others struggling to make a living. People holding a steady job have no right to expect a very high reward.They've chosen the security and peacel life, so they will get limited material being. No pain, no gain; less pain, less gain.
By contrast, people who dream to be a star, either in entertainment or sports world, have deliberately taken a high risk.They know at the outset that only a handl of compes can reach the peak of their dreams; they know that days, months,years, and n decades of concentrated efforts may ultimately turn out to be a complete failure; they know that n if they succeed, they'll have to live with the inconvenience accompanying with their fame, no privacy, no peace of mind, etc. Yet,they also know that the rewards will be very high, which serves as a compensation for their bravery and persistence, their tears and sweat; they know that the society will pay for the dreamers,who have struggled all along to live out their ambitions. No pain, no gain; pain, gain. That's the principle of fair play;that's the essence of private enterprise.
简 评
有人把明星们的奢侈生活与昔室贵族的豪华相提并论，但这两者之间存在可比性吗?他们是激烈竞争中脱颖而出的幸运儿，是什么促成他们的成功?成功的背后又有怎样的故事?这是刘林琳同学对明星现象的解读。
文章开篇的引子很精彩，用许多点的描写组成明星生活的写照，他们的奢华和气派浓缩在短短的一句话之内，有点语不惊人死不休的意思，给人印象深刻。
分析篇章的结构，我们不难看出，第一段引出讨论的主题，第二段阐明了笔者的看法，而第三、四段分别对普通人和明星的工作模式和性质进行比较，从而得出结论，“No pain，no gain; pain， gain．”作为结尾，并且扣题。文章的条理清楚，论说组织有序，但论述的力度不够。比方说，第二段涵盖了两个论据即明星在当今的社会中的社会使命和功能与他们为国库税收的贡献。但这两点都是一句话带过，没有展开论述。其中第一点应该成为文章的重要论据，如果这一点能展开论述和第三、第四段的明星之路的艰辛构成文章的两条主线，成为文章的平衡点，文章的结构会更理想。至于增加税收一点，本身就不是文章要表达的主要，又没有提供任何有说服力的数据，因此显得多此一笔，可有可无.
(点评教师：卢爱华)
